Searching for Courage

I want to give up.  I want to cancel all doctor appointments and my surgery.  This burden is too big for me to carry.  I’ve given it to the Lord but it doesn’t yet FEEL like He has it.  I believe He has everything under control, so why do I FEEL so anxious anyway? The gastroenterologist wants me to get an upper GI sonogram.  This test is easy and noninvasive.  But he also wants to do an endoscopy — you know that procedure where the doctor knocks you out and then sticks a ginormous camera down your throat?  I’ve been … Continue reading Searching for Courage