October 26th is the Big Day. It’s the day that I will take the plunge and get rid of my inner girl parts, forever. As one of my good friends told me once, what has my uterus done for me lately, anyway? 🙂
Of course as soon as I scheduled the surgery, my internet research trying to find funny quotes (I need a little humor to get me through this!) instead brought up horrible websites that demean the practice of hysterectomy and blame doctors for pushing it on patients. They advise women to be strong and tough and WAIT IT OUT until they reach menopause.
I almost filled out the contact form just so I could give them a piece of my mind. My doctor did NOT push this surgery on me. This was presented to me as an option two years ago. Since that time, my quality of life has dwindled down to the pit. Waiting it out for another fifteen or so years would probably make me jump off a cliff. This is a decision that I’ve come to through prayer, and the Lord’s fingerprints are all over it, from the women he’s placed in my path to tell me of their positive experiences to the ultrasound diagnosis of adenomyosis. It’s surprising me that I’ve gone from being scared to death of a minor diagnostic laparoscopy to advocating the more radical hysterectomy.
My brother reminded me today that the righteous are bold as lions. Proverbs 28:1 says
The wicked run away when no one is chasing them,
but the godly are as bold as lions.
I think I resemble the Cowardly Lion in Oz a bit more than the real thing…but I do take strength from that thought. I am free to be bold because the Lord himself is with me. Please pray that I will indeed be bold and that I won’t let disparaging websites or others distract me from this course. God placed me here, in this period of time, with all the medical technology available, rather than back in the 1700s or 700s or 7s, at which point I would already be considered way past middle age with one foot already on the way out of this world.
Please lift up Dr. Reisler in prayer. Pray that God will use him to heal me, that God will give him wisdom and insight and understanding into my particular case and will give him exactly what he needs in order to make me well again. Also pray for his family and his life outside of medicine. Being a physician in today’s world is not easy — they suffer through the economy just as much, if not more than, rest of us. Many of them are leaving medicine because they can’t even break even.
Pray for my husband, my daughter, and the rest of my family as they struggle with dealing with me and my neurotic fears between now and October 26th and especially for the time afterwards when I will need so much help. My poor husband will have to be nursemaid, homeschool dad, laundress, cook, and taxi driver for a couple of weeks until I regain my strength in addition to his “working from home” duties. Basically, he’ll have to be ME!
Praise God for giving me courage to schedule this surgery in the first place!
This is a weird one: please pray that I will be able to eat and eat well. Losing weight is not a good idea for me right now. Anxiety tends to melt off what little fat I have.
I can’t thank you enough for your comments on FaceBook, Twitter, this blog, and via email. You are helping my family and me walk this journey, and it means so much to know that we have your virtual — and for some of you — your literal — support.
If you have any movie or book ideas to pass along, please do so! I will be a lady of leisure for at least a couple of weeks and want to spend my time healing — and basking in the attention! :o) Truthfully, the thought of two weeks of not being ALLOWED to do laundry or cook sounds almost like a vacation!